Interesting title, huh? Allow me to explain why I felt the need to write a blog post with said title.
Today, I needed to buy some groceries and a new hairdryer ( my fourth one in about a year, but that's another story entirely.) Since I only wanted to go to one place, I decided to go to Wal-mart. I fixed my hair, put on some makeup, slipped on a dress (a Lisette passport dress to be exact), and drove to the store. I was about 2/3 of the way finished with shopping when a man, probably in his late 50's, walked into the same aisle that I was in. I was just minding my own business looking at the granola bar options when he decided it was acceptable to come up to me, rub my back, and tell me he thought my dress was pretty. This was not a pat on the back like you're trying to get someone's attention, this was a full on rub my back. Disgusting!!
I was taken aback that he did that and didn't really know what to do. I moved away from him the best that I could and he wen on his way, presumably to touch other people who don't want his grubby hands all over them. Unfortunately, this is not the first time something like this has happened. Last summer, I want to an auction where a 60 something man repeatedly put his vile, sweaty, repulsive arm around me. This behavior is neither acceptable, not flattering! However, on the drive home I had some time to think of some things. First, I was debating ways to sterilize my dress, and secondly I wondered if the fact I was wearing a dress had anything to do with his obnoxious behavior?
It seems that every time I wear a dress out in public, as opposed to pants, I get more unwanted stares from men, particularly those in the 50 and up crowd. If the dress is vintage or has any hint of retro-ness about it, it is almost a guarantee that even more men will cast their creeper eyes your way. Want to wear red lipstick with your retro dress? Be prepared for gawking. Creepers love dresses! Ever worn a pencil skirt, sweater, pantyhose, and heels into a convenience store? If you have you most certainly know what I'm talking about.
Now, it's not really the staring by men old enough to be my grandpa that bothers me. Men are men, and men will look, but when they feel that somehow they have the right to touch that's when it becomes a problem. Just because I am 40 years your junior does not mean you have somehow "earned" the right to rub my back or touch my hair. I am not a touchy feel-y person in any way, and I especially don't want strangers to touch me.
It seems that men of a certain age harbor some sense of nostalgia about the past, and when they see a woman dressed in a dress or heels, they recall those fond memories of a time gone by. The reason that I say this is that when I wear jeans there doesn't seem to be as much rude attention by the coffee and suspenders crowd. I think part of the problem could be contributed to the area where I live. Virginia is firmly in the Bible Belt, and the part that I live in is even more reluctant to change and believe the ways of the past are the only good and acceptable ways. The notions that a woman should be in a knee length skirt, barefoot, and pregnant are still held by a lot of people in this area. It stands to reason that if you believe that above notions, then you still hold to the belief that you can put your hands all over women whenever you so choose.
So, I guess the bottom line is, it doesn't matter how you were raised or what your beliefs are or how old you are, don't put your hands on me. If I am wearing a retro dress and it makes you think of times gone by, good for you, I don't really care if you look at me, but don't touch. If you really like my dress that much, a simple compliment without any physical touch will get your point across. I get it, you don't see many women wearing dresses, skirts, heels, or pantyhose, you like it, and you wish more women dressed like that. What you don't seem to get, creeper, is that just because I am dressed that way does not mean I hold to the beliefs of the past, and next time you do it, I won't be a "meek and gentle spirit" like you think I should be, and I will call you out on it. You have been warned!
So, readers, have you had to deal with any creepers lately? Do you find yourself getting more unwanted attention from old men when you wear a dress or heels? How about something vintage or retro? I'd love to hear your thoughts!